Before I jump toe-testing-first into the shallow waters ((heading for the deep end)) of this blog, I wish to say THANKYOU. Thankyou to the those of you that interrupt your perfectly fine day, and quietly come to this site to read. Thankyou ((times2)) to those of you that care enough to leave a comment, whether agreeing with me or disagreeing, I thank all of you kind and wonderful souls for visiting…THANKYOU!! Now, on with the  profundity of the Perkins perspective! OY!
Like any curious 46 year old ((my age in 1999)) that receives a medical diagnosis for something that she/he has never heard of, I sprinted to the library and the book store searching and researching until my eyes blurred over. Not wanting to “rent”  the particular book that pertained to peri-menopausal women, I purchased this gigunda  resource, so that I could underline the interesting and factual information that applied to my condition. This doctor-authored book was chocked-full ((900 pages worth)) of info about women and what might possibly go haywire! Why it appeared that we are merely ticking time bombs on a countdown to implosion at any fricken-fracken moment!!
Specifically the chapters that referred to fibroids were my true concern, as I just needed a good solid scientific treatment option for this fibroid-ridden uterus. All of the usual facts and figures about fibroids were layed out clearly and concisely. But, sprinkled in with good science was something that I did not expect at all! Right there on the page, in black and white, were the words that read: ” Fibroid tumors represent our creativity that has never been birthed. Fibroids are often associated with conflicts about creativity, reproduction and relationships.” What in the tarnation!!??
Keep in mind that this is a world reknowned OB/GYN author that I was desperately seeking answers from, so as to avoid a life-altering operation. And keep in mind, that I do believe that emotions can and do dictate well-being…to a DEGREE!!! And I believe in positive-thinking,  primarily because, negative-thought makes me feel like doodoo!
I first glimpsed this thought/causational relationship back in the 1970′s, when my mom’s friends where being diagnosed with breast cancer only months after losing a spouse by divorce or by death. Somehow, the correlation factors of the stress of spousal loss was directly related to the immediacy of their cancer diagnosis. Was it Fact or Folly!? I don’t know!
Sooo…the information that I was digesting regarding my “unbirthed creativity” had my brain smoldering with fiery thoughts and my ears releasing smoke signals…for weeks. Why?…because by golly, if I was anymore creative my husband would be lost in a sea of  glue-gunned hand-painted decorative doo-dads, never to be found again! There is not a square inch of space in our abode((walls, ceiling or floors)) that in someway does not reveal that a very artsy-fartsy gal lives here (( along with her highly “decorated” husband!!)) And the surrounding gardens, that hug the perimeter of our property, are bursting at their proverbial stomatas with an abundance of bountiful beauty at every turn. Why, this stifling nature by no means pertains to me or my unmet creative juices at all, forsooth!!
Now, as far as reproductive conflicts that may lay unresolved and  disease inducing…heck, I hit the jackpot both times and have 2 wonderful children. Couldn’t be happier!! Okay then,what about the last variable to this untapped-creativity puzzle and possibly having a negative marital relationship!! Well…I married my high school sweetie…need I say more?!!
I have never quite shaken the thoughts that I may, in fact, be shuttering in my creativity. This mold never really fit me, but I must say that it does keep me on my toes AND there is always a  project not far behind! You see, there is this persistent thought ((of “unbirthed creativity”)) that has been forever branded and continues to rise from my permanent rolodex ((brain)) and, will never leave.
Today, I am prone to listening and exploring with TWO thoughtful ears. One with a scientific imperative, and one with an innocent childlike fantasmagorical ideal…insisting that ((for example)) thought-waves are as forceful and as strong as sound-waves are!!
The treatment choice of HIFU was indeed a miraculous SCIENTIFIC option that finally, and completely, rid me of  my fibroid forever and ever. Alas, mostly I am guided by the science of empiricism…but… there are “somethings” that are just inexplicable, and we shall leave it at that!! Hey…what was that?? Did you just see that soaring disc in the night sky?